Thursday, May 31, 2012

Sunset Suppers.

The most magical part of my day is dinner time. I love sitting together as a family, eating and talking about the day, thankful we are all home safe and happy. Last Sunday I cleaned up our patio table and recovered the seats in a fun fabric. Since then we have enjoyed every dinner (and some breakfasts too) Al fresco.
Monday's Lasagna and Salad.
Tuesday's Meatballs and Sweet Potato Fries.
Wednesday's Soft Tacos.
Uh, Goo? That Popsicle is much more satisfying right side up.

Wednesday, May 30, 2012

Zig Zag.

In college I took a year to study fashion design. I took two textile courses, pattern making and every sewing class available. That being said, I don't make clothes for myself or The Little Girls and I hate following traditional patterns. I can however make my own patterns and so when my sister-in-law asked me to make her a diaper bag based on a handbag I used to make (and sell) I said yes. From start to finish it took me about 5 hours. I love to sew and miss the free time I used to have for this hobby. I haven't allowed myself the courage or energy to put aside time to work on a project like this and so I say thank you to Jenny for believing in me and my rusty sewing skills.

Tuesday, May 29, 2012

Saturday Night we went to a Sacramento Rivercats game. Tim was so happy to watch the A's farm team win big against the Reno Aces. Manny played which was an added bonus. We met up with my sister Dee Dee, her boyfriend Tony and the Nybos.
Ex-Governors after their footrace. The Little Girls were both frightened and curious of these guys.
The Nybos; Eva, Alexandra, Robbie and David watching the game.
Tony (love the glasses!) and all of us.
 Auntie Dee Dee was busy with the kids all night. Kids flock to her, they just instinctively know how much fun she is!
Several times I caught myself thinking, this is the perfect Saturday night.

Thursday, May 24, 2012

Young Bloods.

Have you seen this? Do yourself a favor...watch this now.

Wednesday, May 23, 2012

Magic Realized.

The Little Girls have this movie about a girl who is half mermaid, half human. She changes from one form to another by touching her necklace and saying, "I wish to be a mermaid." The other day at Savannah's school's Book Fair, Ivy saw the mermaid book with accompanying necklace and begged me to buy it. I realized after the purchase it was the necklace she wanted not the book because the moment we walked in the front door she squealed with anticipation while asking me to fasten it around her neck. Her eyes were wild with delight as she looked from me to Savannah leaning forward and whispering "I hope it works..." She gently pinched the shell with her fingers, squeezed her eyes tightly and said, "I wish to be a mermaid." Then she looked down to her toes expecting to see a tail and fin. She looked back up at me, quizzically. Her face was a mixture of sadness and relief. She just stood there for a minute then her face lit up with an idea. She leaned forward and whispered in my ear, "Mama, I think it only works in water. Is it bath time yet?" I realized just then that I love and hate these moments of childhood discovery. When magic attempted, fails. Reality sets in and that idyllic blindfold of innocence slips away from the mind's eye. For Ivy, the merciful blessing of a young imagination hasn't left her jaded. She will undoubtedly try magic again.

Tuesday, May 22, 2012

Over The Weekend...

We celebrated Tim's Mom's birthday!
We attended Spring House which is Savannah's school's Spring BBQ and open house.
Tate and Ian came to stay and play! Is there anything cuter than little boys chasing little girls while playing kissing tag?
The Goo is teething, crawling and eating which must be a build up to a huge growth spurt.

Friday, May 18, 2012

Yesterday was Savannah's Kindergarten field trip to the Sacramento Zoo and Fairytale Town. God Bless 3 brave Kindergarten teachers for taking 75 students plus a multitude of camera-toting parents on such a grand adventure.
Savannah was so happy to run around the zoo with her best friends Gracie, Sophie and Ivy too. Gracie's lovely mommy Sarah and I chaperoned these happy kids.

Thursday, May 17, 2012

Regret.

I always miss my Mom.
The heartache I feel is for the happy times I had with her, her wisdom and wealth of knowledge about almost everything, her confidence, courage, warmth, the softness of her skin and missing who I was when she was alive-seeing myself as she saw me. Lately I have not just been missing the happy times but the hard times too and sadly, her last few years were hard years. The truth is, my Mom struggled with pain the majority of her adult life. My Mom was athletic as a teenager and very comfortable in her own skin. At some point during her teenage years she was in a bad car accident at which time her body began to fail her. Her neck and back were in bad shape. When I was ten, she had surgery to remove a brain aneurysm which led to years of chronic and debilitating migraine headaches. Later she had surgery to fuse vertebrae in her neck together and the list of ailments and surgeries goes on and on. Growing up I don't remember her suffering or expressing discomfort but as an adult I was very aware of it. Then there was the depression, which I am certain was magnified by the pain. She medicated the pain and the depression, the combination of which left her unable to function creatively. As a perfectionist she felt frustrated and dejected in any artistic task or basic task really. When I would come home from college, I never knew how I would find her; groggy and dazed or lucid and peppy. Our relationship was strained around the time Tim and I got married. She had had a mental break of some kind and was spending time in a facility, detoxing from medication and trying to find some peace. I was hesitant to ask for her help or involve her in the planning because of her fragile mental/emotional state. But you know, that was so painful for her. She desperately wanted to spread her creative wings and fly but I kept clipping them back. We both said things and well like I said, our relationship was strained. A few years later we were having a fight while she was medicated and she told me all she wanted was to be a Grandma. I threw in her face that I wasn't going to have kids until she got healthy. The look on her groggy face scarred me. After I said it I felt terrible but hoped our argument would be forgotten by her medicated state. But she didn't forget and what I said haunted our friendship. During those hard times I wondered what the end of my Mom's misery would look like. And now I know. It looks empty and desperate, like I am drowning without her. I know that even on her worst day, I would want her here with me because the hope of a good day would be right around the corner. Not like now, where neither her good day or bad day is on the horizon.

My Mom was a cheerleader in high school. And Prom Queen too. When I was little, I would beg her to cheer for us with her old pom poms. I loved it. 

Wednesday, May 16, 2012

Short.

Miss Savannah made the big decision to stop growing her hair as long as Rapunzel's and instead, cutting her hair like her lovely teacher Mrs. Reeves (yay for healthy role models!). So she and "the bob" are together again.
 Now she looks like this (with Ivy Jane). Which reminds me of this...
 September 2010.
Summer hair feels so good!

Oh and in case you are wondering (of course you were!),
this is my view while shopping at Home Depot. Sometimes I am startled my by own reality...
I. Have. Three. Kids. (yay!)

Monday, May 14, 2012

Ease.

Mother's Day weekend was a dream. Tim cleaned the house, took care of food for the kids, gave baths, changed diapers, ordered me to take a nap/read/run/spend time doing whatever I wished and supplied me with coffee, water and lemon drops.
Ivy and I planted our vegetable garden and Tim and I made a new shade for the playhouse.
We ate sushi,
 Miss Savannah made me breakfast in bed...
then The Goo ate it.
Today I am feeling well-rested, tremendously appreciated, so so lucky and well, happy.

Thursday, May 10, 2012

Really Spring.

The Dogwoods are in full bloom here at The Honey Hut. If I could capture a day in a bottle, I would choose this day. It is perfect; the birds are singing, the flowers are in bloom, the air is sweet and cool, the trees and grass are that chartreuse color of new Spring, the kids are happy...perfect.
I haven't felt much like being indoors which is why this blog is getting, well...dusty. I do post photos from time to time of little moments here and there, if you use Instagram you can find me @thehoneyhut.

Tuesday, May 8, 2012

Tim's sister Angela and her family came for a visit while we were on vacation. Living so far apart means The Little Girls rarely get to spend quality time with Addie, they were all so happy together. Couzie Heaven.
Angela (8 months pregnant!) playing tag with the kiddos at sundown.